"girls will sense that shit"
Feb. 5th, 2004 02:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
egypturnashThis was originally posted as a comment on ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
pseudomanitou's journal - he was quoting a few choice bits from a sarcastic list of life lessons. I found this too amusing a glimpse into the way I think to not put here for everyone to see.
Dungeons and Dragons never goes away. Girls will still sense that shit 20 years later.
...and the most interesting girls are the ones who can fire back war stories about their twenty-first level Drow paladin.
The only really good story I have is from the 'minor gods' campaign, where the PCs were just that.
We were supposed to go deal with this huge divine fortress. Well. Instead of going in head-first, we went to the local tavern and one of us took the shape of a Mysterious Old Man who has an Adventure suitable for a Party of Three to Seven Characters between Levels 9-12. They got crisped pretty quick.
Hey, none of them were our worshippers, what did we care?
Ultimately we pissed off the DM by figuring out the quick way to get to the top of the tower, instead of slogging our way through level by level. n.n
Oh, and there was the Blake's 7 game, where I was an insectile spiky alien who somehow got allied with the party, and there was the near-future game where I was a hacker who happened to be the daughter of a net AI that liked to present as Yog-Sothoth (yes, she got called the 'Dunwich Whore'), and there was the anthro raccoon from out of Shadow in an Amber game, who got cursed such that every wizard he met would immediately hit him with a minor curse (which was modulated by the fact that one of the first curses he got from that was that every wizard he met would then, subsequently, bless him), and the cyber-implanted unicorn in a Shadowrun-type setting with a deflowering fetish... I always tended to end up with the weirdest character in the party. The most 'normal' one I can remember was a half-elf mage called Delbit the Unhinged.
Um, what was my point? Oh, that's right, I don't think I really had one. I just felt like hinting at some war stories. There aren't that many, I tended to fade into the background while other players with better people skills monopolized the spotlight.
Anyway, I can say that I'm one girl who wouldn't want to have anything to do, romantically, with someone who'd never gathered around pizza with several friends for a long session of role-playing.
pseudomanitou's journal - he was quoting a few choice bits from a sarcastic list of life lessons. I found this too amusing a glimpse into the way I think to not put here for everyone to see.Dungeons and Dragons never goes away. Girls will still sense that shit 20 years later.
...and the most interesting girls are the ones who can fire back war stories about their twenty-first level Drow paladin.
The only really good story I have is from the 'minor gods' campaign, where the PCs were just that.
We were supposed to go deal with this huge divine fortress. Well. Instead of going in head-first, we went to the local tavern and one of us took the shape of a Mysterious Old Man who has an Adventure suitable for a Party of Three to Seven Characters between Levels 9-12. They got crisped pretty quick.
Hey, none of them were our worshippers, what did we care?
Ultimately we pissed off the DM by figuring out the quick way to get to the top of the tower, instead of slogging our way through level by level. n.n
Oh, and there was the Blake's 7 game, where I was an insectile spiky alien who somehow got allied with the party, and there was the near-future game where I was a hacker who happened to be the daughter of a net AI that liked to present as Yog-Sothoth (yes, she got called the 'Dunwich Whore'), and there was the anthro raccoon from out of Shadow in an Amber game, who got cursed such that every wizard he met would immediately hit him with a minor curse (which was modulated by the fact that one of the first curses he got from that was that every wizard he met would then, subsequently, bless him), and the cyber-implanted unicorn in a Shadowrun-type setting with a deflowering fetish... I always tended to end up with the weirdest character in the party. The most 'normal' one I can remember was a half-elf mage called Delbit the Unhinged.
Um, what was my point? Oh, that's right, I don't think I really had one. I just felt like hinting at some war stories. There aren't that many, I tended to fade into the background while other players with better people skills monopolized the spotlight.
Anyway, I can say that I'm one girl who wouldn't want to have anything to do, romantically, with someone who'd never gathered around pizza with several friends for a long session of role-playing.
no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 02:52 pm (UTC)Being a cannibalistic Athasian halfling with a bubbly, cheerful personality was great. I'd make you laugh while I chopped the beets into your stewpot.
no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 02:55 pm (UTC)I love kender.
no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 02:55 pm (UTC)That's kinda reassuring, actually.
And, um, this sounds terribly predictable, but when I look back on my gaming career, I spent a lot of time playing paladin/cavalier/swashbuckler types.
no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 03:14 pm (UTC)I mean, I guess I should have suspected, but... damn.
Re:
Date: 2004-02-05 03:20 pm (UTC)My gaming circles tended to use that because we were used to the mechanics. Except, of course, for when we wanted to take out all the polyhedra dice for a nice evening of good ol' AD&D - if we could agree on 1st or 2nd edition.
Oh! And there was the dimension-travelling Baron Munchausen rip-off, too! Outrageous liar, mediocre swashbuckler. I forget his name, or what campaign he was in; he might've been in a short-lived one, or might've been a replacement for the raccoon in the Amber game. Which was played in the officially-licensed Amber system. Which used no dice at all.
Re:
Date: 2004-02-06 01:20 am (UTC)The first really good character I remember was a furry (otter chick) serial killer who cut of people's faces and used magic to become them for short periods of time. Andy was the GM.
We might be sorta weird.
I have some stories. Most are boring.
Date: 2004-02-05 03:43 pm (UTC)So, here I am, Shelzari lowborn blessed with the blood of Golthagga pumping through my veins and a tongue so smooth you could - Well, a smooth tongue. I'd just started to come in to the prime of my sorcerous ability, having hooked up with a party of adventurers irrelevant to this story.
Deep underground, in a temple to the foul demon god Orcus, we were facing off against a swarm of frothing goblins, mad with a fanatic passion. One of them vanished in a cloud of smoke, and I paid him no mind until he reappeared out of nowhere a trice later and buried a crossbow bolt six inches in to my aorta.
Once I was brought back from the dead, we returned to the dungeon, more cautious this time. When we found the jail, we could not help but have sympathy for the poor, pathetic halfling who we found trapped in the Iron Maiden, in such pain and woe. Who would have thought that as soon as we found the clerics who ruled this layer of the dungeon he would bury a knife in my heart through my back and reveal himself as the very goblin who killed me the day before, magically disguised?
He was killed seconds later by my irate companions.
Two days after THAT, when we stormed the great temple at the center of the dungeon, I was flash-fried by a bolt of lightning thrown by a demonic general, and raised from the dead in the middle of combat to continue fighting - a disorienting experience.
Woefully, unexpectedly, I was killed AGAIN a week later by a nymph as I flew through the forest, her dewy hair and blooming anatomy filling me with such wonder and lust that I simply lost track of my body. By the time I realized what had happened, she had already flitted away. It was... embarrasing.
Once I was brought back from THAT death, we finally reached the forest of the Hornsaw. There, death lurked everywhere, in the xenophobic razor-horned unicorns who lurked in its shadows to the mammoth, shambling undead behemoths that wandered it forlornly. I was killed by a shrubbery. I stepped in it to without noticing and its vines wrapped around my neck.
By this time I was growing discouraged.
In the center of the forest we found a covey of titan-worshippers. They, lurking in the darkness, gave their foul praise to the bitch-queen Mormo, from whose blighted womb were spat all poisons and snakes and vermin. This time it was a fireball that got me.
I grew discouraged at last, and decided to leave the group I was with before I perished yet another time. That is the story of I, Aluire the Many-Deathed.
It is also an extremely BORING story, but you knew the risks when you invited me to talk about dungeons and dragons.
Re: I have some stories. Most are boring.
Date: 2004-02-05 03:58 pm (UTC)I've heard far more boring ones. This one at least had comedy value!
I just hope you ditched that set of dice.
Pishtosh.
Date: 2004-02-05 04:54 pm (UTC)Re: Pishtosh.
Date: 2004-02-05 05:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 03:45 pm (UTC)Re:
Date: 2004-02-05 03:50 pm (UTC)Sounds to me like 'Life Lessons Learnt by Being An Unimaginative Fucktard for Many Years', really.
no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 05:44 pm (UTC)Gaming story
Date: 2004-02-05 04:22 pm (UTC)The character's proudest achievement came perched only about 100' above the ground in a ruined tower. Our party had been attacked by the tower's last inhabitant, a mad former baron. He nearly killed the group's pacifist cleric of Kuan Yin, with one blow of his mighty enchanted axe, and he sprung up the narrow stairs, with the party's ranger and cavalier in hot pursuit. The baron turned and - again with a single blow - cut the ranger down. Sheer luck meant the ranger crumpled onto the stairs, rather than plummeting to the ground far below.
I was next. My chances of survival were rather obviously low.
The proper response was probably waiting for the baron to close, and hack at any opening he presented (being a madman, he was strong and tough - just not thinking). The heroic response of course would have been to attempt to throw my longsword through his chest.
It went off like a charm, and the baron fell screaming from the tower to land in a crumpled red heap at its base.
The anticlimactic part, of course, is that the pacifist cleric had a number of scrolls of resurrection, and promptly used one on this mad baron before insisting the party escort him to the nearest temple.
Re: Gaming story
Date: 2004-02-05 05:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 08:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 09:10 pm (UTC)When you can play an offensive character and have people laugh and have fun BECAUSE of it, now that's a good RPG accomplishment. Makes me wanna play him again.
no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 10:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-02-05 10:39 pm (UTC)Re:
Date: 2004-02-07 12:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-02-06 10:05 am (UTC)Haha, yes :D
GEEK PRIDE